by Elia Strange
Sometimes it feels as though it is really difficult to think positive thoughts.
Your thoughts maybe recalling a time when something not very nice happened in your life, or perhaps the time when you argued with your boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife, your friend or someone in your family.
Maybe you feel negative because somebody was very rude to
you this morning and this action has rapidly changed your mood for the worse or
even perhaps be completely overwhelmed by it all as you are heading down the
dark path of divorce. Anyway, “Yes you”, there are always more than enough
reasons why, so to change your mood for the better what you now need to do is to
take control of your thinking and force it to be distracted from thinking about
whatever you were feeling troubled about.
Have a look at
the suggestions below and see if you can use some of them for yourself.
1. If it is possible, take yourself to the cinema after you
have carefully selected ‘mood’ films that you feel will provide you with the
emotional upheavals, comedy, drama or horror film, that will keep your
attention focused. It might take a few attempts to fine tune your ‘mood film’
selection skill’s and be able to choose whatever works for you.
2. Sit in a peaceful place and read something engaging; try
to read about a variety of different things that you think might be of interest
to you. Then it becomes so much easier to find that interesting book,
motivational magazine or to track down those obscure articles on the Internet
that you always wanted to read.
3. Selectively start looking through your photographs and
briskly removing from sight, the ones that remind you of troubled times as you
plan to create different albums. Fill one with photographs of the wonderful
times that you’ve had on holidays with your family or friends. Then when you
need a lift you can revisit these moments in time and spend a while enjoying thinking
about the fun and laughter you had with them.
4. Engage with a new hobby; the challenge of starting a new
hobby can push at the limits of our comfort zones but it is quite easy to get
the best enjoyment from a new hobby. All it requires is a high level of concentration
whilst researching the subjects and then careful logistical planning so as not
to interfere with your current life. A hobby could suit someone who has suffered
from negative thoughts for awhile, for example if they are currently going
through a difficult phase in their life. Hobbies, such as intricate jewellery making
or converting a motorcycle to fuel injection, can keep you happily distracted
whilst you are learning new practical skills and becoming better at using them.
5. If the ideal of a hobby doesn’t interest you then you
could look at a short or long term courses, such as starting to learn a new
language. As with the ‘hobbies’ above, this is a broad tactic for someone who
is going through a difficult patch at the moment. If possible, find a course
that makes you join a group, this provides fun and help from others whilst you learn
a new language there.
6. Volunteer to help, it might be to help your friend and it
could be to babysit or help them to redecorate their house. Or you could assist
in one of the many litter picking walks along public footpaths. I know this
sounds cheesy but by physically doing something different this action will make
you think differently that day.
7. Start writing a dairy, not just little messages but just
write down whatever comes into your mind, about the “Good or bad” or the “Happy
or upsetting”. You could write for an hour or two about how your day has been if
you like, setting out what has dissatisfied you and you will vent your
frustration onto the paper and you will feel much better for it. Guaranteed.
8. Go outside, walk to the library, shops, or your local
market. Go anywhere where you can walk about and look at thousands of different
things to distract yourself from your gruesome thoughts.
9. Talk to your parents or your family, even though they are
the closest people to us, and sometimes this can feel like the hardest thing to do. But our loved ones can often supply the unconditional love and support that we
need to cheer ourselves up. Think carefully about what and how you are going to
say something and be aware that sometimes talking to them can help, but
sometimes it doesn’t, you have to make your own decision with this one.
10. Make an appointment to speak to a professional
counsellor as there is nothing better than offloading all of your private and
personal problems on to a professional. As they are not emotionally attached to
your situation they will often make you see things in a way that you would not and
thus can make you see your problems in a different light too.
Whatever you do, these activities are not the permanent solution
to your problems, but the distraction can help temporarily. Sometimes we just
need a little time to allow us to cope and whatever works is fine.
The way that you cope (or deal with things) can be "emotionally-based", perhaps by distracting yourself by creating an interest in going to the movies or out shopping. Or it could be "solution-based", where you are looking for the answers to your problems. For example, from a counselling session or by finding the needed piece of information on the Internet and by finding this answer you can create a solution-based method of coping.
Please don’t use alcohol or drugs to make yourself feel
better as they are known to only work short-term and usually make you feel
worse the next day. The underlying problem is still in there, but now you might
feel even more depressed because you had ‘a little’ last night. So don’t go
there, start taking back control of yourself. Book that counselling session and
if you have a good friend, invite them for coffee and chat with them.
'A problem shared is
a problem halved'
Other articles you might like:
Depression Test: How depressed are you? (Test)
Do I have Social Anxiety?
Symptoms of Stress
What is Bipolar Disorder?
How well can you cope with stress? (Quiz)
Signs and Stages of Stress
I am depressed... What to do?
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